A blog mostly for my mom.
I went to the dentist the other day. He asked me if I spoke any Korean. I said no. He carried on the rest of the appointment in Korean. He gave me a mirror to witness how swollen the back of my gum was. It was his way of telling me it's not a cavity. … Continue reading A note on minimalism
"It's fake. You can tell because the shape of the aquarium is a rectangle. Real jellyfish would tear their bodies on the corners. So, real ones have to be kept in circular tanks." "That's right, you studied biology." I cut myself off and noted that I sound like a post from r/iamverysmart. Everyone who made … Continue reading Dirt on my shoulder
"I'm bored." For a second, I wasn't present. I used to admire pictures of Gwangan when I was applying for EPIK. The illuminated bridge was not just the background of my laptop but a metaphor. Bridging my life to something more interesting, adventurous. Now I was there, chainsmoking, trying to forget the set I just … Continue reading A man called Alice
Like the humidity in Korea, my optimism is rising about 5% each day. I've had a great week. I taught my students the word for butt chin and I ate a pizza with avocado on it. It feels like I could stay in Korealand forever. My life is starting to come together like paper mache. … Continue reading Pink clouds
I'm 29 days sober. And so far, not drinking has done nothing to fix my life. I feel unworthy and damaged. In Japan, I felt awesome. I felt strong, independent, and that I could do whatever I wanted. It was a vacation high. I want to blame my misery on my location. It'd be so easy to just say that I don't like Korea. But that's not the truth.
I stopped drinking in March. Although I've been dancing with the idea since November, I've always had one great reason not to quit: I didn't want to. I must have given a different reason to each person that asked why I stopped drinking. I needed to quit smoking and it was too hard with a … Continue reading March madness – sobriety edition
Happy International Women's Day
